FOR HER EYES ONLY Read online

  He still didn't know exactly what had happened at dinner, but he was sure the acrid smell of something burned had more to do with the lack of meat than Michelle's cooking skills. What had warmed him was the way Michelle was getting along so well with his sisters-in-law. Hell, he wasn't as comfortable around them, and he'd had months to adjust, while all she had needed was a couple hours. He shook his head, deciding it was a woman thing.

  He wasn't sure when it had happened, or why. But an overwhelming urge to make her his wife for real, for always, filled him to the point of pain. The impulse could have begun as early as the day they met, when he'd sat across that café table from her, watching her lick foam from her upper lip. Or when he'd brought her home, mingling reality with the surreal quality of the past few days until he could no longer discern one from the other. He couldn't imagine his life without her in it. Tucking her tumble of dark hair behind her ear. Smiling her sexy little smile. Getting him to bare his deepest emotions in a way that scared the hell out of him, yet made him feel … real.

  The memory of the quick ceremony in Toledo, Ohio, emerged. He cringed. She deserved better than a few hastily exchanged vows before a judge with a drunken pastor as their witness. As cutting edge as Michelle appeared to be, she'd wanted a traditional wedding with all the trappings, and he found he wanted to give it to her. The whole nine yards. The wedding dress with a train that would stretch all the way to France, if that's what she wanted. A full bridal court. A huge rock that could try but fail to match the light that seemed to make her glow from within.

  He glanced longingly at the stairs. What he wouldn't give to go up to his room and climb into that bed next to Michelle. And then propose to her properly.

  But he couldn't, not yet. This time he intended to do it right, but he had some things to do first.

  Jake stuck the elephant on the chair behind him then cleared his throat. "Guys, this is, um, a little difficult for me, but…"

  Marc was practically one with the sofa, his long legs stretched out next to the pizza boxes. He regarded Jake with a long look, then crossed his arms. "Gotta tell you, Jake, we were wondering when you were going to get around to asking."

  Mitch cleared his throat from Pops's armchair. Jake blinked at him, not missing the grin he threw his way. "Anyone time it?"

  David made a production of looking at his watch. "Nine hours, twenty minutes and thirty seconds." He grimaced. "Shoot. That means Pops won."

  Jake rubbed his palms on his sweats. Sweats. He still couldn't believe he was wearing them. Truth was, the suckers were mighty comfortable. "Anyone feel like catching me up to speed? Ask what? And what did Pops win?"

  David sat forward, resting his forearms on his jeans-clad knees. "Well, ask us to help you find little Lili, of course."

  Marc took his feet off the table. "We all bet how long it would take for you to finally speak up. Pops won."

  Jake rubbed his chin, realizing he needed a shave. "What?"

  David grinned. "Truth is, while you were upstairs this morning, doing whatever it is you were doing with Michelle, we all took turns with the phone and started pulling strings and yanking chains. We would have filled you in before, but we were waiting for any real news. Besides, we figured you'd ask for help eventually, and we didn't want you to think we were interfering by bringing up the idea first."

  Jake frowned, trying to take in what his brothers were saying but feeling as though he was missing a few of the finer points.

  Mitch's face sobered. "Granted, during our phone conversations two days ago, you didn't give me a whole hell of a lot to go on. But it was enough to piece together the situation. And with that slime puppy Mollens calling here—"

  Jake nearly choked. "Edgar Mollens called here?"

  "Yeah. Got Pops first. It wasn't pretty," Marc answered. "He tried back again yesterday, but didn't get much farther with Mitch."

  Mitch shrugged. "Shoot me, but I don't like people threatening me or any of my brothers."

  "What did he say?"

  "Nothing that matters now." Mitch waved him off. "What I'm trying to say is that about an hour ago, Gerald Evans, Lili's father, was pulled in by authorities in his area, and we're awaiting further word. Pops's doing, if you want to know. While I still have some contacts at the FBI, no one was willing to do anything quite this shady."

  David spoke. "Hey, I have some pull with the DCPD, too, you know. It wasn't just Pops."

  Three McCoy brothers stared at him.

  Marc shrugged. "Unfortunately, I wasn't able to do much with the Secret Service, either—"

  Jake held his hands up. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you guys telling me here? That you went ahead and worked on finding Lili on your own? Without being asked? Without…" His voice trailed off, the explosion of gratitude he felt for these brothers of his overwhelming in its intensity. For the first time in a day, hope surged through his veins, joining his increasing determination to find Michelle's … their daughter.

  "Yes, that's exactly what we're saying." The perpetual grin that split David's face vanished, replaced by a weightier expression, one Jake had never seen him wear before.

  Pops came into the room from the kitchen, apparently having finished his telephone conversation. Liz and Mel were on either side of him, their confusion evident. The recliner creaked as Mitch got up. "In fact, I'm betting Pops has some news to share."

  Jake practically leaped from his chair. He looked toward the stairs to find Michelle standing near the bottom, leaning against the wall, listening. Myriad emotions flickered across her features, her eyes large in her pale face. He wanted to go to her, but he could do little more than stand there and stare at her, then Pops, his heart thudding in his chest.

  "I've found her," Sean announced.

  The expectant hush that filled the room was nearly suffocating. Jake stepped forward. Michelle rushed to Sean. "Where? How? Can I see her?"

  Pops's grin was all-consuming. "She's at a downtown D.C. hotel with her grandparents. How? Well, that's a little more complicated." He reached out and touched Michelle's arm. "And, yes, you can go see her. In fact, you can pick her up as soon as you're ready."

  The floor shifted beneath Jake's feet. It seemed impossible that after everything they'd done, everywhere he and Michelle had gone, his father had accomplished in a few hours what they couldn't in several days. "Uncomplicate things, Pops. Explain to me how … how you found her."

  Sean's grin melted into a simple smile. "I'd really like to take all the credit for this, but I can't. You'll see what I mean." He cleared his throat "This morning I had a few of my buddies at the station call a few of their buddies, until someone found someone who worked in the Lucas County sheriff's office in northwest Ohio. It didn't take much convincing to have them pick up one Gerald Evans and take him to the local station. It was there under pressure of questioning that he revealed where his parents were." He crossed his arms. "The funny thing is, Lili's grandparents had already come to the conclusion that what they were doing was wrong, no matter that the law was on their side, technically speaking. They were already on their way to D.C. from where they were staying in New Hampshire—" his gaze scanned Michelle's ashen face "—to bring little Lili back to you, Michelle. They checked into a hotel a short time ago and are waiting for you to come."

  Michelle looked ready to rush out the door. Sean gently grasped her shoulders.

  "One more thing. They, the Evanses, asked me to pass on their apologies—"

  "You've seen them?" Jake interjected.

  "No. I spoke with them on the phone. I wanted to make sure everything was on the up-and-up before I said anything." He looked at Michelle. "Anyway, once everything is settled, they said they'd like to be in contact with you, you know, to keep them posted on how Lili is doing. And while they'd understand if you said no, they'd like you to consider allowing Lili to come visit every now and again."

  He handed Michelle a slip of paper. "That's their number. Sometime down the line, you might want to give them a c
all, you know, when you're ready. Or—" he shrugged "—don't. I figure after what they've done, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want your daughter to see them again, even if they do gain some points for bringing her back to you."

  "Which hotel?" Jake asked, grasping the item he'd left on the chair and checking for his car keys.

  Sean told him.

  Jake took Michelle's arm and led her toward the kitchen. "Hey, wait up!" Marc called, following.

  "You're not going anywhere without me," David said.

  Liz dabbed at her eyes. "Mitch, warm up the truck. We're going to need the room."

  * * *

  Michelle couldn't quite bring herself to trust that her daughter had really been found. She stood in the hotel lobby shaking like a hand mixer, expecting any moment to hear that the Evanses had changed their minds and checked out, no forwarding address provided. Or to be told that she could see Lili, but Sean had misunderstood and that her daughter was going to remain with her grandparents.

  Jake's presence next to her meant more than she could express, but she didn't dare turn to him for support or seek warmth in his arms. No matter what happened in the next few minutes, she'd made her decision. There was no going back now.

  The elevator doors dinged then slowly slid open. Michelle's heart nearly burst straight through her chest.

  Lili!

  Inside the cubicle, her daughter held the hands of Gerald's parents and had her little chin tilted up, rattling on about something or other, so she didn't see Michelle right away. Then she shifted to look into the lobby. She stopped speaking mid-sentence, then catapulted herself toward Michelle.

  "Maman! Maman!"

  Michelle's sob seemed to fill every corner of the lobby … and seep through every crack in Jake's heart.

  He stood silently and watched as Lili flew into her mother's arms, speaking in a combination of rapid-fire English and French, her small arms squeezing Michelle's neck, her short skirt hiking up to reveal cartoon-laden undies.

  "I know you tried to call, baby," Michelle murmured, covering her daughter's face with kisses and tears. She must have realized she'd spoken in English, because she immediately started speaking in French.

  Pops came to stand next to Jake while the rest of the McCoy bunch hung back. It had taken three cars to get them all there, but Jake was glad they had come. "Pretty little thing, isn't she?" Pops said.

  Jake nodded, completely incapable of speech. Not because he didn't have anything to say, which had always been the case not long ago. But because he couldn't possibly push anything past his throat if he tried.

  "I always thought French was one of the more interesting languages," Mitch said from the other side of Jake. "Do you know what they're saying?"

  Jake shook his head.

  Behind him, Marc loudly blew his nose into a tissue. Right on the heels was David's voice "For cripe's sakes, are you crying? Jaysus, Marc! What is it with you married guys, anyway? Before you know it, you're going to be crying at those TV commercials like Mel and Liz do."

  "Stuff a sock in it, David," Mel said, taking the tissue from Marc and sopping the tears from her cheeks.

  Jake listened to the arguments with half an ear. His focus was on the woman he loved, who was being reunited with her daughter. And he was standing across the room completely paralyzed, without a due as to what he should do, if he should be doing anything at all.

  He was also aware of the prickle of exclusion. As much as he hated to admit it, he recognized the sensation too well to ignore it. It was the same way he'd felt growing up. He'd always been a part of the McCoy family. Participated in the Sunday dinners. Visited at least twice, if not three times a week. But he'd never really felt … included. That is, until today, when his brothers and father had pitched in without even being asked to do something for him. Just because he was one of them. He'd realized lien that he didn't have to tow it alone any longer. That he'd never had to.

  He also stumbled onto the true, mind-boggling extent of his feelings for Michelle.

  When had he stopped being a silent loner? When had he trusted himself and those he talked to with things he had to say—without fear that they'd ridicule him or that he'd embarrass himself?

  He knew exactly when that moment had happened. The instant he met and fell in love with Michelle Lambert. Opened his heart and let her in, not just partially, but all the way.

  He noticed that Connor had joined the group at some point in the chaos of leaving the house and had come along. He stood to the side, his arms crossed, his gaze hooded as he watched the reunion. Of all of them, he seemed the least impressed with what was going on.

  Michelle finally disentangled her arms from around her daughter, though she kept a grip on her, as if afraid the girl would vanish again if she completely let her go. She turned her daughter so that they faced Jake. She looked at him and said something into Lili's ear in French. Then she smiled and repeated it in English. "Lili, honey, say hello to Jake."

  Lili hesitated. Her gaze seemed locked on his knees as she put one of her shoes on top of the other. Then she looked into Jake's face.

  Jake swallowed so hard, he could swear it echoed through the room. "Hello, Lili," he managed to say.

  She gazed at him intently a moment, and in that instant Jake realized how very much she resembled her mother. "Hello."

  Jake's heart did a funny little somersault in his chest. His gaze flicked to Michelle. But rather than looking at him, she was saying something to Lili in French, her face serious. "Nice to meet you, Mr. McCoy," Lili said slowly.

  "It's … nice to meet you, too, Lili," he said, trying to keep emotion from his voice. "I, um, have someone here who's been looking forward to seeing you." He produced the stuffed elephant from behind his back.

  "Julianne!" Lili practically flew to him.

  Jake crouched, holding the toy out to her. His gaze swept her from the tip of her blond head to her toes. She was so small. So fragile. He wanted to reach out and touch her, but didn't dare. He contented himself with a smile. A smile she returned before she stepped back to her mother, murmuring in French to her inanimate friend.

  "Thank you," Michelle said quietly, though she could have been talking to anyone given the way she looked strictly at Lili.

  Jake wasn't sure what was happening. Why had Michelle instructed Lili to call him Mr. McCoy rather than Jake? But now that he had put a name to the feeling he'd grown to know too well, the rejection he felt cut deeper than it had.

  Michelle rose to her full height, clasping Lili's hand in both of hers. "I … I don't know what to say," she said to the group, biting her lip as her eyes filled with tears anew. She included the Evanses, who stood just outside the elevator, in her sweep. "Thank you … thank you all so very much."

  A couple of Jake's brothers coughed, and behind him, Marc blew his nose again.

  Lili tugged on Michelle's hand. Michelle bent to let her daughter say something in her ear. The stage whisper ended up being louder than regular conversation. "I love Nana and Grandpa, Maman. And they love me."

  Michelle seemed to choke on her reply as she smoothed wisps of Lili's white-blond hair from her face. "I know, baby. I know."

  Her gaze lifted again to Pops and the rest of them. Jake tried to tell himself it was the emotion of the moment, that with all that was going on Michelle was preoccupied, but again he got the distinct impression she was purposely avoiding his gaze. "I don't know how I'm ever going to repay you. But I will." She finally looked at him, and the finality he saw there nearly booted his heart straight from his chest. "I will."

  * * *

  Two hours later, Jake stood outside his bedroom door, his eyes tightly closed, his hand a hairbreadth away from knocking on the hard wood. He released his breath.

  The long drive to the McCoy place from D.C. had been bad enough, what with Liz, Melanie and Pops riding with him and Michelle and a very chatty Lili, who seemed to bask in all the attention, none the worse for wear after her ordeal. But as soon as
they were inside the house, Michelle had all but swept little Lili up and disappeared into his bedroom, where they'd been for the past half hour.

  "English, Maman. I want to talk English," he heard Lili say through the door.

  There was a pause, then Michelle said, "All right, baby. We'll speak English, if that's what you'd like. Come here." The sound of clothes rustling. Jake envisioned her pulling Lili onto her lap. "I'm so very, very proud of you, do you know that? So very proud." The girl giggled.

  "And I missed you so very, very much."

  "How much?"

  Jake smiled where he stood on the other side of the door. It appeared Lili shared more in common with her mother than her knockout good looks.

  "More than the whole wide world, baby," Michelle said and loudly kissed her. "More than the whole wide world."

  Jake opened his hand from where it was rolled into a fist, debating whether he should interrupt. Truth was, he didn't know where things stood between him and Michelle. Now that she had her daughter back, was there room in her heart for him?

  The door opened. Jake started, looking guiltily at Michelle, who appeared to be just as surprised to find him there. He cleared his throat. "I'm sorry … I just wanted to make sure that … you know, everything is okay."

  The smile she gave him was tremulous, at best. "Yes. Everything is mote than okay, Jake."

  He scanned her rosy features, thinking he would never tire of looking at her. Drinking in her energy. Her innate sensuality.

  Then her gaze slid to the floor, and she opened the door a little farther. "Come in. I was just coming to get you."

  Uh-oh. Jake stood frozen for a long moment, not liking the sound of her voice, the way she had said the words. He reluctantly followed her in and closed the door behind him.

  Lili sat at his desk, her thumb firmly in her mouth, her elephant sitting in front of her. "Hi, Mr. McCoy," she said around her thumb.